I need to dream.
I need to believe.
I need to know that I have some control in my life.
That if I work hard, that I will be rewarded.
That life is not arbitrary.
I need to believe that bad things happen to good people, for a greater reason.
That dedication, sacrifice, hard work, discipline are all worthy attributes that will eventually produce extraordinary results.
That if I live a certain lifestyle, that my family will be better for that.
That there is a direct link between my actions and my results.
That If I prepare properly that I can face the insurmountable foe and look him in the eye and say “Bring it on, I can take whatever you can dish out.”
I need to keep living in order to save me from dying.
“Life is a difficult assignment. We are fragile creatures, expected to function at high rates of speed, and asked to accomplish great and small things each day. These daily activities take enormous amounts of energy. Most things are out of our control. We are surrounded by danger, frustration, grief, and insanity as well as love, hope, ecstasy, and wonder. Being fully human is an exercise in humility, suffering, grace, and great humor. Things and people all around us die, get broken, or are lost. There is no safety or guarantees.
The way to accomplish the assignment of truly living is to engage fully, richly, and deeply in the living of your dreams. We are made to dream and to live those dreams.”
“I am the sum total of everything that went before me, of all I have been seen done, of everything done-to-me. I am everyone everything whose being-in-the-world affected was affected by mine. I am anything that happens after I’m gone which would not have happened if I had not come.”
― Salman Rushdie
“Life on earth is a whole, yet it expresses itself in unique time-bound bodies, microscopic or visible, plant or animal, extinct or living. So there can be no one place to be. There can be no one way to be, no one way to practice, no one way to learn, no one way to love, no one way to grow or to heal, no one way to live, no one way to feel, no one thing to know or be known. The particulars count.”
“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.” – Bob Marley
Reflection of sadness in a dying flower…
Despite me trying to get something more lively out of this flower, the final outcome is…sadness and sorrow…(to me at least). I will dedicate this to the one that just left us, way ahead of his time…Now he is once again with the one he loved. Two angles walking through the greatness of heavens in eternal happiness.
Ultimately we are alone as a piece of the puzzle that this universe represents. Alone in our thoughts , in the pursuit of our dreams and happiness. We can have the illusion that something or someone can make our dreams come true, can bring us the ever wanted happiness. That is a state of mind, and nothing else. When the end comes and we turn into the dust that created us, we will be alone and nothing but illusions will be left behind. That is reality…and when we accept it, we begin to live ! Only then we begin to appreciate the moments that put together this trip we take from birth to the inevitable passing into non-existence. Life is a game we are bound to lose , so what counts is what we make of it. A second can be a lifetime , we just have to see it likewise !
Ce înseamnă pentru noi o reuşită? Să reuşeşti probabil pentru mulţi este echivalent cu a avea succes, a ajunge acolo unde ne-am propus..şi tot aşa..Dar oare după, cum ne simţim? Cum este după ce excaladăm zidul care ni se pare uriaş şi greu de atins, de a fi urcat?!
Minunat! Şi după ore bune de împlinire personală sau în echipă o luăm de la capăt şi normal, uităm de succesul anterior, uităm de greutatea cu care am lovit pentru a sparge zidul din spate…Mulţi considerăm asta supravieţuire, dar oare nu ar trebui să înţelegem că provocarea adevărată a fiecăruia dintre noi nu o constituie zidul în sine ci lupta pentru a-l urca sau mai uşor, a-l sparge?!
Mă uit în urmă şi observ că de fiecare dată când am reuşit să depăşesc zidul uşor nu am simţit cu aceeaşi intensitate plăcerea faptului că am obţinut ce mi-am propus ca atunci când mi-am aruncat ciocanul asupra zidului cu mult mai multe lovituri.
Întotdeauna este vorba despre un zid, fie că se află în faţa noastră sau în subconştient, el acţionează şi deseori te împiedică fie să poţi merge mai departe fie să respiri aer liber. De aceea este necesar să parcurgem mai multe etape până la momentul cheie când îl depăşim, pentru a trece cu adevărat pragul dincolo de zid.
We, unaccustomed to courage
exiles from delight
live coiled in shells of loneliness
until love leaves its high holy temple
and comes into our sight
to liberate us into life.
and in its train come ecstasies
old memories of pleasure
ancient histories of pain.
Yet if we are bold,
love strikes away the chains of fear
from our souls.
We are weaned from our timidity
In the flush of love’s light
we dare be brave
And suddenly we see
that love costs all we are
and will ever be.
Yet it is only love
which sets us free.
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like” – (Lao Tzu)
“Cred că toţi aşteptăm pe cineva, persoana potrivită, momentul potrivit, aşteptăm să se întâmple ceva, acel ceva de ani de zile aşteptat, să apară şansa pe care ne-o dorim în profesie…aşteptăm. Dar să înţeleg că, defapt, noi aşteptăm arbitrul care să ne judece, să ne indice dacă am greşit, să ne confirme sau infirme drumul bun?! Aşadar ar însemna că aşteptăm ca cineva din jurul nostru să ne spună cine suntem, ce trebuie să facem şi mai ales să ne spună ce viaţă să trăim?!
În acest caz ar trebui să ne scuturăm şi să ne privim mai bine în oglindă; cum să permitem altcuiva să fie noi?! Cine suntem noi, atunci, dacă aşteptăm ca altcineva să ia decizii pentru noi, să răspundă la întrebările adresate nouă?!
Nu mă împotrivesc aşteptării, dar o văd ca pe răbdarea necesară pentru momentul potrivit. Să avem răbdare dar să acţionăm în paralel, să învăţăm din greşeli, să fim atenţi le ce ne înconjoară şi să mergem mai departe pe drumul nostru.
Să nu uităm de noi în această aşteptare ci să ne descoperim , să ne lăsăm suprinşi de ceea ce ni se oferă şi să facem din aşteptare un mijloc de a zâmbi frumos vieţii.” – (by Mite)
Life exists only at this very moment, and in this moment it is infinite and eternal, for the present moment is infinitely small; before we can measure it, it has gone, and yet it exists forever… – Alan Watts
“Before you know it you’ll be asking, “How did it get so late so soon?” So take time to figure yourself out. Take time to realize what you want and need. Take time to take risks. Take time to love, laugh, cry, learn, and forgive. Life is shorter than it often seems.
Here are few things worth thinking about, before it’s too late:
- This moment is your life. – Your life is not between the moments of your birth and death. Your life is between now and your next breath. The present – the here and now – is all the life you ever get. So live each moment in full, in kindness and peace, without fear and regret. And do the best you can with what you have in this moment; because that is all you can ever expect of anyone, including yourself.
– A lifetime isn’t very long. – This is your life, and you’ve got to fight for it. Fight for what’s right. Fight for what you believe in. Fight for what’s important to you. Fight for the people you love, and never forget to tell them how much they mean to you. Realize that right now you’re lucky because you still have a chance. So stop for a moment and think. Whatever you still need to do, start doing it today. There are only so many tomorrows.
– The sacrifices you make today will pay dividends in the future. – When it comes to working hard to achieve a dream – earning a degree, building a business, or any other personal achievement that takes time and commitment – one thing you have to ask yourself is: “Am I willing to live a few years of my life like many people won’t, so I can spend the rest of my life like many people can’t?”
– When you procrastinate, you become a slave to yesterday. – But when you are proactive, it’s as if yesterday is a kind friend that helps take a load off your back. So do something right now that your future self will thank you for. Trust me, tomorrow you’ll be happy you started today.
– Failures are only lessons. – Good things come to those who still hope even though they’ve been disappointed, to those who still believe even though they’ve tasted failure, to those who still love even though they’ve been hurt. So never regret anything that has happened in your life; it cannot be changed, undone or forgotten. Take it all as lessons learned and move on with grace.
– You are your most important relationship. – Happiness is when you feel good about yourself without feeling the need for anyone else’s approval. You must first have a healthy relationship with yourself before you can have a healthy relationship with others. You have to feel worthwhile and acceptable in your own eyes, so that you’ll be able to look confidently into the eyes of the people around you and connect with them.
– A person’s actions speak the truth. – You’re going to come across people in your life who will say all the right words at all the right times; but in the end, it’s always their actions you should judge them by. So pay attention to what people do. Their actions will tell you everything you need to know.
– Small acts of kindness can make the world a better place. – Smile at people who look like they are having a rough day. Be kind to them. Kindness is the only investment that never fails. And wherever there is a human being, there’s an opportunity for kindness. Learn to give, even if it’s just a smile, not because you have too much, but because you understand there are so many others who feel like they have nothing at all.
– Behind every beautiful life, there has been some kind of pain. – You fall, you rise, you make mistakes, you live, you learn. You’re human, not perfect. You’ve been hurt, but you’re alive. Think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, and to chase the things you love. Sometimes there is sadness in our journey, but there is also lots of beauty. We must keep putting one foot in front of the other even when we hurt, for we will never know what is waiting for us just around the bend.”
“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.”
“I WOULD HAVE MY EARS FILLED
WITH THE WORLD’S MUSIC
LET ME HEAR ALL SOUNDS OF LIFE AND LIVING”
“IF YOU DON’T LIKE SOMETHING, CHANGE IT. IF YOU CAN’T CHANGE IT, CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE.”
“LIFE IS NOT MEASURED BY THE NUMBER OF BREATHS WE TAKE,
BUT BY THE MOMENTS THAT TAKE OUR BREATH AWAY”
(Maya Angelou quotes)
Who am I ? … I will never believe those who say they found the answer to this question. For if you ever really search for an answer, you will find that it is impossible to ever know as you are never the same, you are in a continuous change. You are what is around you mixed with what you make of it. And you are always different. Even if just by a very small fraction, you are always different from whom you were a minute ago. Our brain can process 1 million bits of information per second while we can be conscious only of about two thousands bits per second (this is debatable, numbers may vary, the idea is important ). That makes it even harder to ever know who we truly are. The only certitude of who I am is now, when I feel my fingers pressing different keys on the keyboard, trying to express my thoughts in words, pressing my back against the chair, sipping some water to wet my dry lips. This is who I am now. But after I finish this? After my brain processed few more millions bits of information and after I become conscious of few more thousands of the same, I have no idea whom I will be then!
People might think they know, and often people say they are good, they love thing, they love others, they don’t like one thing or another…they have friends, they enjoy reading….and this is who they are. But is it really true? For example…being good !…if you were ever put in the extreme situation of having to save your dearest ones, your children, your life by having to murder another innocent person , would you do it? There are people who will do it without blinking , most of the people will do it but will be marked for life , and very few people who will not do it. But would you do it? You don’t know. And if you would do it, would it be a bad or a good thing? Whom would you be then? A cold blooded murderer or someone full of love (for his close ones)?
I hate bitter taste…and often it makes me gag…but yet I love coffee without sugar, and I don’t know what else that tastes bitter I would like as I didn’t try everything out there. Can that be me, the guy who hates bitter, but yet he likes few bitter things? if that were true and I was that guy, that won’t define me very well. I do or I don’t like bitter? I don’t know…I know I don’t like some things I have tried already that were bitter and that is all.
So my answer to this question is – I HAVE NO CLUE ! All I can do is educate my mind for my inner self to know who I am at every given moment. Not control my soul, my heart, my body or my instincts with my EGO, but be as conscious as I can of everything that my existence throws at me and have faith my subconscious self will make the best out of everything else. I can stop trying to control everything and wake up every morning to start a fresh new day, with new challenges, pleasures, disappointments and whatever else might be and enjoy them all , but don’t hold on to them, as there will be another day coming where I will miss the new for holding on to the old. Love with passion and fall so I can get up more aware of were I step. I can Dream big, I can hope and I can desire.
I am what my life is !
(I hope this makes some sense to you and your comments are always welcomed…just don’t mind my poor writing skills. And just so you know, in the last image I was about 14kg heavier than now )
My old Foe ! Yes it is True . And even though I should be wiser and maybe, while trying to make a living (just trying for now) somewhere where one should think of being more self contained when it comes to such affirmations , it looks like I am even more twisted than I thought, and the self-destructing instinct is kicking in to stand up for my believes, and against what I believe to be a major force of harm to humanity , morality and the contemporary society as a whole. And so, I pledge to stay honest to myself and bare the criticism of some of the people I most care for and some appreciation from others of the same…and hope for that to be the only worry and no other authorities will take notice of my humble writing and my modest attempt at big ideas. (an here I say to the one that I started to care for a great deal, maybe more than expected, that now I am trying to do my small part and hope will make even the slightest change in the bigger picture )
Just so you won’t be in a shadow of unsatisfied curiosity, my old Foe is RELIGION. We have and ongoing battle for quite a while now. I know I shouldn’t probably personalize religion as this gives it more importance that it deserves, and just looks rather stupid, but I do take this as being kind of a personal matter. You see, as a young man I found myself in situations were often I called for the one up there to just blow a bit of hope my way and in the way of the innocent around me falling pray to nature’s worst flesh and soul eating horrors. And still, every single week, way ahead of their time, souls were perishing into the abyss, and mothers’s tears were ever flowing on the white sheets were once lay their unfortunate children and you could almost hear their hearts screaming , you could almost smell the dreadful suffering and emptiness that was left behind in their worn out bodies.
I always believed that in that suffering I found the strength to fight against the most optimist predictions, and be here today to lay these words down, never forgetting what it took for me to be here. As a result , I can’t help it but feel deeply disturbed at how morality and human behaviour can be distorted by my sworn enemy – religion.
Just watch the news….Bangladesh, Egypt, India, Palestine (though it is widely publicised as being a terrorism issue, it takes only couple of clicks from a mouse to find that in Palestine is actually a religious conflict were Jews just want their promised land trough means that make the most genocidal maniac feel like an innocent child ), not too long ago England, Philippines, Sri Lanka, Burma. Couple of days back 9 people were killed in Egypt during sectarian violence (you see…the word religious violence is not used… because for convenience, Major religions become sects when it comes to unwanted publicity). The Religious leaders were keen in condemning the acts committed by their followers, but aren’t they the ones preaching the word of god to the same mobs that now find it suited to kill each other in the name of the god they so blindly believe in ? The leaders keep on claiming that the scriptures are widely misunderstood and therefore whatever it is written down in holy books is still to be followed, just that it is a bit harder to comprehend for some. Why not make it simple? why not make it clear? Easy to understand , easy to follow?
I wasn’t surprised when, during the many debates I had on this issue, I was given the excuse that god the all mighty made us, but he also gave us the power of free will, so therefore it is our choice to do good or evil, to go up to havens or go down in hell, though he watches over us, he forgives our sins, he can do miracles and save lives , but only when he wants to. And after all the lives of those poor bastards dying in such violence, or maybe the few millions children starving across the globe, or all those women and men mutilated through the cruel practice of circumcision are not worth the effort of a small miracle.(I know the argument for circumcision…and it just doesn’t hold up even for believers.It is and will always be mutilation. It just contradicts the religious view of us being made in the image of god. So circumcising somebody for religious purpose is admitting we are not perfect , therefore god is not perfect…and so on..)
I wrote this before… a wise man said that ” a bad man will do bad things, a good man will do good things. To make a good man do bad things you need religion”. And you have the example in today’s Egypt and Bangladesh. Neighbours, people of the same blood, that share the everyday struggle of living in a country ravished by a revolution, having the same fears of not having food to put on the table for their families, murder each other because of their gods. It is the perfect example on how religion can make good people do bad things.
So my dear friends, brothers and sisters, it doesn’t take much to be good…you just need to find it in you to stop believing in fairy tales, and as the child grows up from Santa Clause and Easter Bunny, maybe we should all grow up from this sick and twisted, gravely immoral Religion and move on to be better human beings, kinder, gentler , wiser. Lets love and be love, without categorising individuals on religion, colour, status and ranks in society. After all we are fighting a lost fight….and we all end up in the same dirt from were nature gives birth to its beauty. The journey we inevitably take to our ends doesn’t have to me marked by such cruel and immoral judgement. This journey can be beautiful !!! In essence that is all that life is…the beauty of the journey from birth to death.
Maybe I got carried away …but you surely get what I mean. As usual, I hope nobody will find my opinion offensive and I invite any valid and educated argument against it. Ignore this if you find it erratic and nonsensical ,or criticise it if you wish to…as long as you put some thought into it.
These are just some snapshots of Dubai International Airport. Couple of days back I spent almost twelve hours there. Huge and beautiful airport with everything your heart desires readily and easily available for decent prices. Luxury brands available at every turn of the head, luxurious hotels here and there, restaurants and bars that serve all the food and drinks you ever want. People , like ants, going by their business, running to catch a flight or spending some money from the budget they have for their vacation on things they don’t really need , or looking for that place where they can enjoy the difficult to understand pleasure of inhaling the smoke out of a fine cigarette while gently sipping some caffeine.
And yet, you start getting a quite uneasy feeling when you know that , despite having all the life’s small pleasures there, at your wallet’s desire and possibility, you are stuck in a bubble, you don’t smell the wind and you don’t really feel the sun burning your skin. You can not go anywhere until it is facilitated to you.
Probably, seeing the speed of evolution in technology and in peoples dreams, during our lifetime , we will get closer to having colonies, trying to continue life in the vast universe our planet is a grain of. Would I be able to adapt to such a life? Would I ever want to live such a life? Not sure…and I am glad that I might actually not need to find out (or at least I can hope I don’t need to find that out) .